Two in the pink, two in the stink

I was having coffee with my friend Joel today and he put up one of his hands and made the "v" for victory sign only he put his first and middle finger together on one side, ring and pinkie together on the other. I guess that could also be the vulcan sign for "live long and prosper." But this meant something completely different. Apparently this is a sexual move that one of our mutual friends had performed on her a few weeks ago. Read the subject title to get a clue what to do. I guess it works really well. I wouldn't know, though it did make me laugh.
I added my new ipod shuffle to my computer. I'm so excited since now I can run outside and I don't have to wear my super heavy regular sized ipod on my arm anymore. It's also a sad day when I think that my regular ipod is "heavy" when it doesn't even weigh more than a pound. I just have to wait for it to warm up to above freezing before I brave the Brooklyn streets.
What else? I watched the Super Bowl XLI (that's 41 for you illiterates), Bears vs. Colts. The Colts won 29-17. I only watched for the commercials, and Prince! He did the halftime show. It's hard to believe he's 48 and can still rock, though he was wearing a weird bandana. But it was raining and he shouldn't catch cold at his age! During the game, my roommate (who is Canadian) asked if I could name all 50 states. Joel and I had a contest to see who could name more. I thought I could, but I got 45 out of 50. I forgot Wisconsin, Kentucky, Michigan(!) Colorado and...damn! I still forgot the last one. Joel got 46, I think. But that's 'cause I think he cheated off me. There was a day when I laughed at people when they didn't know all the capitals let alone states.

I Forgot to Mention

I was lamenting that I hadn't seen a real live celebrity since I've moved to New York City. So Marta and I were out at a birthday party at Rififi where apparently it turns into a dance party on a Friday Night...who knew? And afterward we went to Lemongrass in hopes of doing some karaoke. But it's so crowded I think you have to tip the waitstaff to get your song in. And they were doing some sort of Karaoke contest...which if I had known about I would have kicked ASS! They already had staked out the six winners. I know, six is a little excessive for amount of winners, but maybe I was jealous. Anyway, those six winners got to do another song each, so we decided to stick around just in case. While we were waiting, I look over at the coat rack and I see this guy standing there. From the side he looked sort of like Jimmy Fallon. So I say to Marta, "That guy looks like Jimmy Fallon." Turns out he was! I would have been more excited if he was actually someone whose acting I enjoyed. He was okay on SNL, but he laughed too much during the sketches.

But at least now I can say I saw a real celebrity in New York.

What comes up, must come down

For every good day I have (monday) I have to have a bad one to even out. I sort of got fired today from my production writing gig. I thought it would be relatively easy to write about cool gadgets, but I think I was sort of set up to fail at it. At least my potential boss was nice about it. I can't really take the blame for it, since they really didn't give me enough direction and I don't do very well being rushed. I probably could have done better if I had a chance to rewrite it, but unfortunately I didn't have time. Though it does make me want to rethink my life again and what I really want out of it. I can't really keep holding on to these stupid pipe dreams if it isn't what I really want to do.
At least I got to see some comedy that was funny at Rififi. Joel and I went, along with my roommate Andrea. The first half wasn't very funny, especially this lady who was doing a French impression and talked about why the "chicken crossed the road." The second half was much, much better. There was this guy who I saw on Best Week Ever who has an act. He has one of those old timey-time voices from those gangster movies from the forties. Kind of a Massachusetts precise accent. He talked about the DC sniper, wishing he was mentally retarded to get dates, and Southpaws.

You Give Good "G"

Remember that guitar I found in my stairwell last month? On Sunday I had my first guitar lesson! My friend Doris came over and showed me how to do some placement with the hands and showed me some chords. I learned how to play a "g" and an "a minor" and a "c." It was kind of tough since I've never really laid my hands on a guitar before, but she was pretty patient. I loved the sounds though. It's a 12-string instead of a six string (which is standard). Doris even said my "g" notes were solid! I felt great. I've only played the recorder when I was in third grade and that's as far as I got. I'm on my way!
Doris and I chatted for a while, then I got on to my favorite conversation...Karaoke! So I dragged out my little player (same one I got for Brayden for Christmas) and sang a couple songs for oris, including Britney Spears' "Oops I did It Again" and Backstreet Boys' "I want It That way." In the middle of "I want It That Way" Andrea (my Canadian Roommate) came in and looked shocked (and a little horrified), saying "I could hear you all the way down the hall. I don't think she approved. At least Doris liked it. I think it was time for Andrea to meet the real, cheesy me.

The Burlesque Show

I had quite a day. I had to go work at 8:30 today for a temp gig. I always seem to have to get there early...I like HBO because it's a late start, like 9:30! It was just to be a receptionist for half a day. I basically sat at a desk for 4 1/2 hours and answered the phone and booked conference rooms. It reminds me of all the crappy jobs I had in Los Angeles for different places. i really should make a list of all the jobs I've had over the years. I mean, every single job. The recruiter wanted me to take this temp to permanent job as a Sales Planner. It sounds really boring, but lucrative. I want to stick to my guns and hold out for a job I at least sort of like. I always remember what my sister's voice ringing in my ears: "Do what you want, Stephen. You don't have child support payments!"
I got out at one, then worked on my resume a bit. I got a call from one of the production companies I've been talking to and they want to hire me to write one of their shows! I'm pretty excited. I really want to show them what I can do. It's definitely a start.
Later, I met Joel for another job meeting at the coffee shop. They gave us some free bagels at closing time. I can't pass up free bagels. Or free anything, for that matter. Joel is doing okay, though he wondered aloud if he could go on welfare. Since he's able bodied and he doesn't have a disability, I doubt it.
Afterwards, we went to Galapagos in Williamsburg to see one of my friend Marta's roommates at a burlesque show. I have been to them before in Seattle, (and in Minneapolis) so I was no stranger to them. They seem to be "retro-cool" whatever that means. This was definitely the best show I've been to, because every other burlesque show contained timid girls and not much tassel action. This had no timidity and plenty of tassel. Joel now wants to start working again, I thought it would be hilarious if Joel learned how to do dreadlocks for me, and I paid him out of pocket. Good side gig, right?

Jello Wrestling and more

Last week I went to a bar called Arlene's Grocery on the lower east side with my friend Marta to watch her friends "El Jezel" perform. Well, they were also performing as Jello wrestling was occurring. Yes, Jello wrestling. Female Jello wrestling. Amateur Female Jello wrestling. It was okay, though the matches went on way too long and some of the girls were not that hot. But they were all actors, which meant that everything was done with a wink to the audience, which I hate. Too much self-awareness combined with no time limit on the matches makes for boring copy. Another weird thing was that there was a French Journalism team there. Yeah, I don't know either. Anyway, the female producer was so bored and hot. She had unbuttoned her sweater to get some air, only she unbuttoned the lowest two and exposed her navel...for some reason I kept laughing at the pink knit sweater on this bored french lady with a pair of sunglasses on her head. Aside from that I learned two things: one: all jello is not equal, this stuff was a crystallized jell-like substance and two: I had a crush on the brown bunny.
During the second wrestling set, Marta and I stepped out to another bar to get a drink. On the way there, I ran into Megan Czechko (I can never spell her name right) from Sell this House! I can't believe I ran into her on the street...she was going to some swank party. She is so sleek looking! That's why New York is so cool--it's so large, yet you run into the same people all the time.
For more information, go to jellowrestle.com at your convenience.

She Punctured My Thumb

My friend Joel has a cat named Fita that hasn't been feeling well lately. I went over to his house last week and we had to force-feed her with a plastic syringe full of cat food. I've never seen this action before! So I forced the food into her mouth while Fita whipped around. She bit down on the syringe and we heard a crack. Joel was concerned the cat would swallow the plastic, so he reached his thumb down into her mouth to catch it. At that moment Fita bit down. HARD. Joel yanked his thumb out of her mouth and washed it in the sink. He showed it to me a minute later, and she pierced the skin, and left an imprint in his nail!
Fita wandered around the house and was upset. Joel was too, he was only trying to help her.

Later that night, Joel was playing some songs on his keyboard. He learned to play "Under My Thumb." I suggested "She bit my thumb." Joel laughed, and wrote a quick song, rewriting the hook to be: "She Punctured My Thumb." It went something like this:

(sung to the tune of "Under My Thumb" by the Rolling Stones)
"She punctured my thumb...
She wouldn't eat,
I thought she was weak,
But she punctured my thumb."

Good stuff.

By the way, this is a cliff's notes version of what happened that day. I had a longer, more detailed and subsequently more entertaining post, but it was eaten by the gods of blogspot. I will never spell check BEFORE saving a post!